Bookends

The Tutorial has ended... we have no more gifts for thee, bah rum bum bum bum. Indeed, two days in a row... this time it will be different. We won't speak in riddles or hide messages under soiled sheets... nor puzzles written in metaphor. Tonight, I will play the role of the listener and you, my readers, hopefully will fill the role as voice and consciousness. Of course, that does require some work and courage on your part. Over the years, you've watched as I've danced about making a fool of myself in my quest in understanding people, emotions, and friendships. I know this may seem trivial to most, but to someone with my limitations... no words could be less true. Constantly, I make efforts to engage in conversation with people and foster some type of friendship... most of the time this ends with disgust and immediate rejection. Although, sometimes I do receive some harsh words instead of being rudely ignored. On the very rare occasion, someone responds in kind and a seed is planted... which I quickly strangle to death in a fit of confusion and social oddity. The problem I seem to encounter most often is the chance to form some type of generic relationship... perhaps a great deal of that is from myself and the words I choose, but the other part is from the populace. It's common knowledge that the internet is filled with tons of fucked up predators looking for someone to hurt or take advantage of for their own lust and greed. Seeing how my only avenue to meet people is the internet, I'm already at a severe disadvantage... on the rare occasion I do go into public, I stare at the ground and never make eye contact. The truth of the matter is this... people terrify me. Despite the fear, for some ungodly reason I find myself continuing on this quest for knowledge and understanding.

So here we are... this conversation has been stated time and time before. Here is where I need help from you, the readers. What is the appropriate conversational link, indroduction or methodology to avoid being classified as one of the dangerous people? I speak politely and state my intentions... perhaps that is too honest and robotic? What is the social protocol or proper age group of people I should be trying to speak with? Where am I going wrong... is there an application format I should be following to discover human interaction and understanding?

Honestly, I am uncertain of the questions to ask of you... so I find myself here, just asking for any help in general. Thank you for taking the time to listen and hopefully someone comes forward with some helpful information. Until we meet again...